EL SEGUNDO HERALD March 3, 2022 Page 9
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Orly Israel from front page
credo is “first you have to listen, then you
do something.”
He has spit-balled different ideas to help
people communicate and connect, ideas that
would also help Israel develop his skills and
“get out of my comfort zone.” He settled on
his “listening table” gambit.
Israel thinks that his family upbringing
may have spurred his interest in taking a
deep dive into the field of communications.
His Dad, David Israel, is an award-winning
television producer and writer and spent a
stint writing for the New York Mets, before
heading west to California some 30-years
ago to start a career in Tinseltown.
Israel mentioned that he and his siblings,
like most if not all families had their share
of tiffs that escalated, noting that “there is
a certain part of a conversation that (then)
becomes an argument, then a certain part of
the argument becomes a fight.”
Why does Israel spend his free time trying
to help and connect with others? “Because
some people don’t have anyone to talk to
who will really listen to them without trying
to fix their problems or tell them to get over
it,” he writes. “And some people don’t have
anyone to talk to at all. And I have also got
my own listening skills to work on. I am
trying to make people feel good by listening
to them, and if they feel good, they might
want to share that feeling of being listened
to with their loved ones, friends, and family.
And there will be a domino effect of sorts,
and people will start communicating with
each other better. That is my big goal, to
raise communication skills across the board.”
Israel’s friend Tiffany Van Goey, who resides
in the Cincinnati area, has joined Israel for
“two or three” sessions at his table. Israel
said that Van Goey participates as a neutral
observer, “effectively a listener in training.”
A mutual friend introduced Israel and
Van Goey. She soon discovered that she
and Israel had a similar interest in growing
communication skills. Of her participation
as a neutral observer, Van Goey said that
she gained great insight in just listening and
restraining herself from the very human trait
of wanting to “chime in” to the conversation,
calling the sessions spent with Israel and
the folks who stopped by the table “very
interesting and transformative.”
El Segundo School Board member Dieema
Wheaton is an Israel neighbor. She shared
about the time she was returning from a
Starbucks run and noticed Israel and his
table. She decided to stop and chat (she did
all the chatting) and does not regret taking
a little time out of her day.
“It was so beautiful,” Wheaton said of
the experience, “because he just listened. I
opened up about all kinds of stuff that I was
not expecting to. It was so organic and easy
to speak with him. It was a blessing that I
was not anticipating.”
Israel also volunteers at a Freedom to
Choose program, where he ventures into
prisons and attempts to connect. He said
that he is also training to be a volunteer for
a suicide hotline.
“I felt like communication skills are only
really brought in where there are crises involved,”
he writes, “and not really held in
high regard for the regular everyday person
with a family.”
Israel started setting up his listening table
in mid-November, trying to be available to
passers-by at least once a weekend. “I’ve
set up my table 30-or-so times. I’ve had
deep conversations with somewhere around
seventy people and chatted briefly with at
least a hundred more,” he said. After the
listening sessions conclude, Israel said that
he “writes about each one of them so that I
can reflect on what I learned, how I felt, and
maybe some lesson I took away.”
He has also started a blog where he has
been posting his thoughts on the conversations
– “keeping them anonymous, of course.”
Orly Israel and his Trusty Listening Table. Photo’s courtesy of Orly Israel.
Checking the social media boxes, Israel also
posts on Instagram.
He said he is “interested in becoming a
writer,” noting that he hones his writing skills
“taking any opportunity to write anything,”
including forays into music blogs and making
magazine submissions.
“I am passionate about communication,”
Israel said. “I have always been interested
in why people say what they say.”
He also created a comic called Space Whale.
It is about two brothers who struggle to get
along and are “lost in space.” Israel draws
on his trials and tribulations growing up as
the oldest of three brothers to develop the
characters, noting it is “a struggle that I’ve
been through, which gave me a lot of reason
to start learning about communication skills.”
Israel moved to El Segundo in November of
2020. Why? “I surf El Porto,” he said, noting
that he has friends from college who also
favor riding the waves in North Manhattan.
He and his friends found a nice house in El
Segundo, with a backyard pickle-ball court.
Growing up in the Palisades, Israel said he
was unaware of our small town. But he is
more than satisfied with his current residence.
“The people who are here want to be here,”
he said. “This really works for me.”
He is still refining his approach to his
nascent program. He said he is still seeking
“a call to action” to expand his efforts. He
said that at this point, he “does not have
any magic answers…but I do have some
questions…Listening is not everything, but
it is the first thing.”
Israel knows that, at 27, he does not have
all the answers. But he decided to dive into
his listening tour, anyway. “A wise man told
me,”he said, ‘if I wait until I’m ready, I’ll
never start.’ I cannot say that I am ready,
but there is the beginning of a story here.”
“What can I do to help?” seems to be a
fitting mantra for Orly Israel. •
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