Page 2 February 25, 2021 EL SEGUNDO HERALD
Your Neighborhood Therapist
Dear Neighborhood Therapist,
My wife and I are recently married. It was
a fairly quick romance, and things are going
well in our relationship, except for one part:
it has become clear that my sister does not
like her. My sister and I come from a very
conservative background and I can see how
my boisterous wife rubs my sister the wrong
way, but the way my sister actively excludes
and dismisses her has begun to cause a lot
of stress in our relationship. I am struggling
with whether or not to confront my
sister directly, or to ask my wife to behave
differently with my family. My wife has
already been patient, and I think my sister
will eventually warm up, but it could take
a long time for her to come around. I hate
this feeling and I’m worried things will get
worse. What should I do?
– Torn in Two Directions, Hawthorne
Dear Torn,
Most of us have the experience of loving
people with whom we do not see eye to eye.
You have been put in a real pickle by people
you love: there is no path forward that does
not involve either addressing your wife or
your sister directly; or doing nothing and
gambling that time will heal the situation
instead of further corroding both of your
relationships; or some combination of the two.
All of us are required to “perform” at
some points in our lives. When applying for
a job, when at work, or when in nearly any
public situation, we do not always get to be
our unfiltered selves. We don’t get to wear
pajamas to church, microwave fish at work,
or say out loud every snarky comment that
crosses our minds, unless we are also prepared
to accept the social pushback. (Please note:
my point applies to behaviors that affect others;
it does not apply to anyone’s individual
identity, which does not affect others.)
Based on your message, it seems that neither
your wife nor your sister are willing to
“perform” for the other. The result is stress
on you because there is no “win-win” in
this situation, and that stinks. You seem to
disagree with the way your sister is treating
your wife, and you have noticed the affects
of this treatment. If you have some power
to influence your sister’s behavior, how long
are you willing to trade your wife’s and your
relationship’s well-being in order not to upset
your sister by confronting her? How much
of this stress can your relationship take? Is
it worth a little stress on the relationship in
order to not alienate a family member you
love? Probably! Most relationships can tolerate
some stress, especially when it’s for the
greater good. But in this case, it’s not a little
stress. It’s a lot. Do it as kindly as you can,
but you are going to have to intervene with
your sister if you want it to stop.
Please write to tom@tomandrecounseling.
com or text to 310.776.5299 with questions
about handling what is affecting your life,
your family, the community or the world.
Tom Andre is a Licensed Marriage & Family
Therapist (LMFT119254). The information
in this column is for educational purposes
only and nothing herein should be construed
as professional advice or the formation of a
therapeutic relationship. •
Police Reports
Monday, February 15th
One male adult was detained at 2118 hours
from the 300 block of Concord Street and
transported to Marina Del Rey Hospital for
72 psychiatric hour evaluation.
One male adult was arrested at 1448 hours
from Imperial Highway and Pacific Coast
Highway for identity theft and driving with
a suspended license.
A burglary (residential) report was taken
at 1616 hours from the 200 block of East
Oak Avenue. Unknown suspect(s) entered
the victim’s vehicle and stole his property.
A burglary (commercial) report was taken
at 1915 hours from the 500 block of North
Pacific Coast Highway. The suspect entered
the store and stole merchandise.
One male adult was arrested at 2329 hours
from the 405 Freeway and El Segundo Boulevard
for driving a stolen vehicle, one LBPD
misdemeanor warrant and one Pasadena P.D.
misdemeanor warrant.
Tuesday, February 16th
One male adult was arrested at 0857 hours
from Pacific Coast Highway and Imperial
Highway for identity theft, impersonating
another person, possession of a controlled
substance, burglary tools and driving without
a license.
One female adult was arrested at 0856
hours from Pacific Coast Highway and Imperial
Highway for identity theft, possession
of a controlled substance and burglary tools.
A male adult was cited and released for
shoplifting at 0843 hours from the 300 block
of North Pacific Coast Highway. The suspect
stole merchandise from the store.
A vandalism report was taken at 1041
hours from the 900 block of East Grand
Avenue. The suspect slashed the tires from
the victim’s vehicle.
A forgery report was taken at 1341 hours
from the 2100 block of East El Segundo
Boulevard. The suspect used a fraudulent
letter to steal the victim’s property.
A court order violation report was taken
at 1544 hours from the 400 block of West
Imperial Avenue.
Wednesday, February 17th
A petty theft report was taken at 1116
hours from the 2500 block of East El Segundo
Boulevard. The suspect exited the
store without paying for the merchandise.
A vandalism report was taken at 1401 hours
from the 1400 block of East Imperial Avenue.
Love Thy Neighbor
Dear El Segundoans,
The Herald staff and I only know so many El Segundoans,
but we want to learn about more of you. With 8,000
residents, we’re sure there are some gems we may have
overlooked or not been aware of them. Do you have an
interesting friend, neighbor or student? With most of El
Segundo sports and events on hold, we are looking to do
more El Segundo residents’ profiles. All you have to do
is ask their permission and send us
their contact information. Of course,
if you find yourself fascinating, send
us your information too.
– Best to you all. HM.
Send your suggestions in
to letters@heraldpublications.com
Please have your nominee’s approval before you submit them as a nominee.
Adam Marcus from front page
By the time he was 15, the student had
become the teacher. Marcus began teaching
acting and started his first two theatre companies.
He was able to leverage the profits
he made from his productions to allow him
to attend New York University (NYU), and
continue to follow his artistic dreams.
Marcus shot 21 movies while attending
NYU, with the last movie, “so you like this
girl,” serving as his outgoing class thesis. He
noted that some of the actors in that collegiate
creation had gone forward to have “huge movie
careers. We had these significant actors before
anybody knew who they were.”
While “so you like this girl” garnered acclaim
in the New York City environs, the powersthat
be at NYU didn’t feel that the project
was “NYU enough” and did not introduce
the film to Hollywood big-wigs. So Marcus
only received two job offers, one to work on
the second season of the hit TV show Twin
Adam Marcus, three decades ago, with the iconic Jason Voorhees
hockey mask from the iconic film, Friday the 13th. Adam Marcus today.
Peaks, and the second from old friend Sean
Cunningham, who counseled Marcus to “come
to LA, be my ‘slave’ for a year, and then I
will give you your shot to direct.”
That sounded good to Marcus, who jumped
on the first available flight to Los Angeles,
and the rest of the story is the stuff of celluloid
history. Not quite. Even though he had
graduated from NYU and was in his very
early 20’s, the East Coast transportation options
were such that Marcus had never had
the need to acquire a driver’s license. Before
leaving New York, Marcus had paid off all of
his student loans, which left him a whopping
three hundred bucks in his billfold when he
arrived in Los Angles to conquer Hollywood.
“Three hundred bucks in my pocket,” Marcus
said, “and no car, and no driver’s license.”
So Marcus did what any aspiring Hollywood
type would do. Leased a flashy vehicle and
secured a driver to motor him around town.
Didn’t quite work out that way, though, “I
bought a 1963 canary-yellow (Volkswagen) bug
that I lived in...but I wasn’t allowed to drive
it,” he said. “It was hilarious. The absolute
worst experience of my life.”
Things would soon take a turn for the better.
Marcus was able to sell a screenplay to
Cunningham that becomes a Disney movie.
Emboldened by his success, Marcus approached
Cunningham and asked for his shot directing.
Cunningham related that New Line Cinema
had purchased the rights to the iconic Jason
Voorhees character (from the franchise Friday
the 13th) and that Cunningham told Marcus
that “if you can find a way to get that damn
hockey mask out of the movie, I will let you
write and direct it.”
And so Marcus was tasked to bring “Jason
Goes to Hell: The Final Friday to the silver
screen. At 23, Marcus became, at that point,
the youngest writer/director ever hired to
make a movie. With nearly thirty years in the
industry, Marcus has had a great deal of success,
but said that the films that he has created
that he cherishes the most are the “personal
films, films that really matter to me...that is
what really sticks with me. “ To that end,
Marcus, his wife and writing partner Debra
Sullivan, and producer Bryan Sexton created
Skeleton Crew Productions. A few years ago,
the trio debuted the film Secret Santa, which
has endured to become a cult hit.
Marcus said he is also proud of his direction
of the award-winning Indie film Let It Snow,
which brought actress Bernadette Peters to
the set after a lengthy hiatus from film, and
also unleashed the talents of Stephen Colbert
in one of his first movies.
Marcus currently has his heart in Indie
films, but has also received accolades for
his studio-supported work. Award-winning
writer John Esposito has worked with Marcus
for nearly three decades. “Not only is he a
major talent, and force-of-nature himself,”
Esposito said, “but he is the biggest supporter
of other people’s talent, in a way that very
few in the industry are.”
Echoed legendary director and special
make-up effects artist Robert Kurtzman, who
has also worked with Marcus for nearly thirty
years: “ We really click on the set,” Kurtzman
said, noting the energy Marcus brings to
production and the fact that he and Marcus
are able to seamlessly communicate on-set
because they grew up in the same era and
are able to reference slices of older movies
that still resonate today.
Marcus and Debra settled in El Segundo
in 1993, with Debra selecting a place very
quickly while Adam was out-of-town, attending
a wedding. Of Debra, Adam says
she is “the funniest, smartest person that I
have ever known. She is a brilliant writer and
remarkable actress.” Adam said he realized
years ago that Sullivan and he “liked the
same kind of stuff” and wondered why they
were not collaborating? Since then, Marcus
said, “It was all about us.”
Said Sullivan about moving to El Segundo.
“I have lived here since I was 18-years-old.”
Originally a Valley Girl, Sullivan said that
her father mandated that when she moved out
on her own, she would land in El Segundo
“because it is safe.” She estimates that she
has lived in five different domiciles in El
Segundo.
So, Debra was asked, how is it working
closely with her husband? “It works
out great,” she said. “As long as you have
mutual respect for each other, and you can
disagree respectfully, everything is fine. For
us, this works really well,” noting how their
writing duo, offering differing perspectives
from both a male and female viewpoint, can
be advantageous to their finished product.
Long-time friend and collaborator Eric
Beetner, film editor and prolific writer has
been a friend of Marcus since their time living
on the East Coast. “Since way back in
high school, Adam’s energy and enthusiasm
were infectious. We began making big plans
at a very young age,” Beetner emailed. “He
had a dream and never let go of it, and it
is possibly the number one thing I admire
about him, that tenacity. It is a quality that
you need in a cutthroat business.”
Marcus has survived the sometimestreacherous
ins-and-outs of making a living
following a dream in Hollywood. And he
seems to be in a pretty good spot in life at
this point. He takes pride in helping artists,
with his Skeleton Crew Productions, “find
their voice,” allowing artists to spread their
wings and “tell their stories.”
Life is good, he said. “ I get to do the
things I love, with the people that I love.” •
See Police Reports, page 4