Page 2 February 6, 2020
Obituaries
Frances Stiglich
Aug 3, 1918 - Jan 26, 2020
“Gone yet not forgotten, although
we are apart, your spirit lives
within me, forever in my heart.”
– Unknown
Calendar of Events
Deadline for Calendar items is the prior
Thursday by noon. Calendar items are $1
per word. Email listings to marketing@
heraldpublications.com. We take Visa and
MasterCard.
THURSDAY, FEB. 6
• Meet Children’s Book Author: Andrea J.
Loney, 4:00 PM. – 5:30 PM., Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester Blvd.,
Call: 310-412-5645.
• ELF Story Time (Early Literacy for Families),
11:30 AM. – 12:15 PM., ages birth
– 4 yrs, Inglewood Public Library, 101 W.
Manchester Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
FRIDAY, FEB. 7
• Teen Club, 3:00 PM. – 4:30 PM., Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
• Teen Games Day, 3:00 PM. – 4:00 PM.,
Hawthorne Library, 12700 Grevillea Ave,
Hawthorne, Call: 310-679-8193.
SATURDAY, FEB. 8
• Family Story Time, 1:00 PM., Crenshaw –
Imperial Branch Library, 11141 Crenshaw
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5403.
• Bark, George! Book Party, 2:00 PM. – 3:00
PM., Hawthorne Library, 12700 Grevillea
Ave, Hawthorne, Call: 310-679-8193.
• Cyber Kids Jr., 10:30 AM. – 12:30 PM.,
Inglewood Public Library, 101 W. Manchester
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5645.
• Family Story Time, 2:30 PM., Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester Blvd.,
Call: 310-412-5380.
MONDAY, FEB. 10
• STEM Activities for Kids, 3:30 PM., Crenshaw
– Imperial Branch Library, 11141
Crenshaw Blvd., Call: 310-412-5403.
• Cyber Kids Class, 4:00 PM. – 6:00 PM., Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5645.
• Bilingual Story Time, 1:00 PM. –
1:45 PM., ages 3-5, Inglewood Public
Library, 101 W. Manchester Blvd., Call:
310-412-5645.
TUESDAY, FEB. 11
• Brick Building, 3:30 PM. – 4:30 PM., free,
Crenshaw Imperial Branch Library, 11141
Crenshaw Blvd., Call: 310-412-5403.
• Hawthorne City Council Meeting, 6:00
PM., Hawthorne City Hall, 4455 W.
126th Street.
• Chess for Adults, 5:00 PM., free, Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
WEDNESDAY, FEB. 12
• Building Bricks/Board Games, 3:30 PM.,
free, Inglewood Public Library, 101 W.
Manchester Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
• Inglewood Visionaries Toastmasters Club
#4404 Meeting, 6:00 PM., Inglewood
Center for Spiritual Living, 525 No.
Market St., For more info: www.ing4404.
toastmastersclubs.org
• Smarty Pants Story Time, 11:30 AM. –
12:00 PM., Hawthorne Library, 12700
Grevillea Ave, Hawthorne, Call: 310-
679-8193.
THURSDAY, FEB. 13
• ELF Story Time (Early Literacy for Families),
11:30 AM. – 12:15 PM., ages birth
– 4 yrs, Inglewood Public Library, 101 W.
Manchester Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
• Family Crafts, 4:00 PM. – 5:15 PM., Inglewood
Public Library, 101 W. Manchester
Blvd., Call: 310-412-5380.
• Terrific Thursdays: Family Movie, 4:00
PM. – 5:30 PM., Inglewood Public
Library, 101 W. Manchester Blvd., Call:
310-412-5380. •
Frances Stiglich, 101 years
young was a long time resident
of Hawthorne, CA passed away
at her son’s home in Fallbrook,
CA on Jan 26. She is survived
by her two sons Joseph of
Fallbrook, CA (married to Sara)
and Tom of West Linn, OR +
four amazing grandsons, Tyler,
Luke, John Maxwell and Alex
Stiglich. Beloved Aunt to Keith
and Charlene Larsen.
She loved to laugh, play games and never
shied away from a chance to right
a wrong. Feisty through her years,
she contributed over 70 years to
the Hawthorne community and
politics. All who knew Fran
were blessed by her indomitable
spirit, coupled with kindness and
wisdom that she freely shared.
A memorial service will be held
to celebrate her life on July 2.
Location is to be determined.
RSVP to jstiglich@aol.com for
more information. •
Your Neighborhood
Therapist
Dear Neighborhood Therapist: I am a
woman in my early sixties and I have lived
in and around the South Bay most of my
life. I have always done things my own way.
I do things like stop and smell the grass. I
get excited by the butterflies in my garden or
the way a single rain cloud moves down the
beach. I have lived my life trying to always
be kind and I usually put others’ interests
before my own. Sometimes people are unkind
to me in very specific ways. They dismiss
my opinions, and tell me I am “doing it all
wrong,” and they try to take advantage of me
in small and large ways, as if I would not
notice. Am I doing “it” wrong? And what
is “it” anyway?
– A.U., El Segundo
There is a word for what people are doing
to you: bullying. And I think what you
are experiencing says a lot more about the
bullies than it does about you.
Bullying does not end with grade school - it
just changes form. Adult bullies often appear
to be enforcers of the “Shoulds” - unwritten
social measures that are often both arbitrary
and culturally specific.
Enforcers of the Shoulds will go out of
their way to tell you everything from how to
peel a banana to what to wear to the beach
to how you are supposed to feel about Kobe
Bryant. Sometimes it comes in the form of
an eye roll. More often, it’s mansplaining.
In any case, bullies feel better when they
remind you exactly how far away you are
from their own particular set of Shoulds.
It’s more complicated because some of us
find the Shoulds helpful. We live in a highly
competitive, constantly changing society that
often leaves us feeling isolated or powerless.
A sense of belonging can be hard to come
by, and shared Shoulds like cheering for our
local team can connect us as a community.
The problems arise when we treat the Shoulds
as a single true way of being, instead of one
valid option among many others.
So the answer is no, you are not doing “it”
wrong. You’re just standing up for trying to be
kind and putting others ahead of yourself in
a world that glorifies power instead. Bullies
often mistake kindness for weakness, but in
choosing your own way, you have chosen a
tougher path than that of the bullies.
There is more good news: there are a lot of
people like you out there. I meet with many
people who outwardly embrace the Shoulds
but secretly want a life closer to the one you
already have. There are a lot of people - even
bullies - who would secretly love to smell
the grass, marvel at the butterflies and chase
rain clouds. You could teach them a thing or
two. Perhaps we should start a local Kindness
Club. Any takers?
Tom Andre is an Associate Marriage &
Family Therapist (AMFT96089) supervised by
Chris Thomas (MFT78020). The information
in this column is for educational purposes
only and nothing herein should be construed
as professional advice or the formation of
a therapeutic relationship. Please write to
tom@tomandrecounseling.com or text to
310.776.5299 with questions about handling
what is affecting your life, your family, the
community or the world. •
Visit us online: www.heraldpublications.com
Film Review from front page
wonderful Michael Stuhlbarg as her husband
Stanley Hyman, Josephine Decker’s Shirley
tells the story of a young couple (Odessa
Young, Logan Lerman) whose life becomes
forever changed by the odd couple. After
accepting room and board in exchange for
household chores and companionship, Rose
(Young) becomes an accidental muse for
Shirley, a famed horror writer. Moss gives
a phenomenal performance as the kooky
yet brilliant artist whose inner turmoil is
a constant battle. Not to be overlooked is
Michael Stuhlbarg, who delivers yet another
scene stealing monologue that is almost as
memorable as his Call Me By Your Name
performance. Beautifully captured by Sturla
Brandth Grøvlen (Victoria, Wendy), who
creates unforgettable cinematic moments
and a moody score by Tamar-kali, Shirley
is a hauntingly powerful film about a strong
woman, made by a strong woman.
- Morgan
Kajillionaire
Miranda July’s Kajillionaire follows a family
of three whose lives revolve around turning one
hustle into the next. Oddball outsiders whose
very existence require them to stand apart from
society in order to break it down and gamify it,
director Miranda July similarly stands outside
the norm to put life’s more strangely beautiful
moments onscreen; such as the beauty of soap
suds that overflow through a factory ceiling,
to pondering some of life’s biggest questions
like what to do when the big earthquake hits.
Led by performances from Evan Rachel Wood
and Richard Jenkins, Kajillionaire is a fusion
of magic and ordinary life that entertains
questions of larger universal life.
- Ryan •
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