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Lawndale 8.23.12

Page 4 August 23, 2012 One Man’s Opinion Political Penguin By Gerry Chong solutions. By Duane Plank Now of course, the Demos were more For several days, the neighborhood talking Fascinated, a neighbor asked, “How do So Mitt “The Glove” Romney has now made than ready to shoot their slings and arrows at cat went AWOL and everyone went into a you see the campaign moving forward”? his earth-shattering choice for his running whomever the Republicans selected to be the panic mode. We declared an Amber Alert “Well,” said the cat, “our selection of Paul mate and the conservative Romney did not man or woman in the shadows as the 2012 and initiated a door-to-door search. Finally, Ryan is a game-changer. Contrast Ryan’s choose to think outside of the box and select campaign heats up. The poli pundits pontificate lo and behold, we found him modeling specific tough love requirement to cure our a female running mate. As championed in this to us that not a lot of folks pay attention to uniforms in a military supply store. He had economic ills with Treasury Secretary Tim very column weeks ago. the November election until the semi-official on shiny riding boots, tan jodhpurs, a chest Geithner’s confession that ‘we’re not here Nope, he selected the somewhat obscure end of summer descends upon us the day full of medals, and a blue sash diagonally to tell you we have any answers. We just Congressman Paul Ryan of Wisconsin, who is, after Labor Day. A day that may find me in across his chest. He snapped a riding crop don’t like yours.’ We recognize that Ryan is according to a tad bit of research, the Elephant Sin City, by the way, if I can work out some on his boot and commanded a white bull a lightning rod for Democratic attacks, but Party champion of cutting taxes. Cutting them all-important logistics on a couple of ends. terrier to sit at heel. he’ll give as good as he gets and addresses for regular Joes. Cutting them for the less But, as I occasionally do, I digress. So the “Who the heck are you,” the neighbors serious problems with serious proposals. As fortunate. And all fired up about cutting taxes Demos painted Ryan as a selection that will chorused, “George Patton?” Mitt says, Ryan will force Obama to ‘get for the wealthy. wreck all the freeloads that the Demos have “Naw,” said the cat. “I’m Mitt Romney’s his campaign out of the gutter’ of distracting Okay, on balance, I am always going to so patiently and painstakingly crafted over the battle planner. I’ve got the whole campaign political ads that most people understand are initially be in favor of cutting taxes. Who in last few years, hitched to taking more money laid out and it’s working perfectly.” With intended to move discussions away from the his right mind wants to fork over more dinero out of our pockets via taxes? that, he unrolled a series of papers on a economic disaster we face. to Uncle Sam? Criminy, we are taxed up the Initially, the POTUS demurred from making table while the neighbors gawked over his “We’re building momentum, ramping up, wazoo. Fed tax, state tax, income tax, petrol any comments about the Ryan selection. The shoulders. taking the offensive, separating ourselves tax. Tax on tax on tax. And all to achieve what? Prez was too busy wandering around his old “Now you noticed that coming out of the from Obama on issues such as Israel’s More pork-belly handouts, more seemingly stomping grounds in the Chicago area, trying Primaries, we were pretty beat up and didn’t defense. People will see the difference well-intentioned government programs that to raise more payola for his reelection bid. have much money. So rather than jumping between our principled stance against Muslim don’t seem to cut the mustard, that tend to Now, I am sure that every President has spent out with a whole lot of aggressive and aggression and the muddled Obama approach hand out the payola to the administrative his fourth year in office fundraising, saying Obama-provoking positions, we cooled it and to appeasement. muckey-mucks, who, to give them the dubious basically to heck with running the country, left him with little to specifically attack. As “Gradually we will increase the pressure benefit of the doubt, may try to do the right trying to solve the nation’s ills, but didn’t my old friend Muhammad Ali said, ‘Let’s on Obama, forcing him to defend his record, thing, but it seems that a lot of our money is you, didn’t we, expect a little more from the do a rope-a-dope thing and let him swing making this race a referendum on his wasted, doesn’t it? ex- Chicago land community organizer when at things that don’t hurt, but sap his assets.’ administration’s follies and identifying his So, have to admit that I did not know a whole he gave his compelling inauguration speech Like Ali, we encouraged him to waste his philosophies as a destruction of American lot about Congressman Ryan before Romney’s some three-plus years ago? money while we raised and conserved ideals. pollsters and handlers anointed the 42-year-old Said some Demo vitriol after the Ryan ours. In the last three months, Obama has “Our party’s platform will show a reverence as a possible President of the United States. selection: “A Romney/Ryan ticket is sure to outspent us three-to-one and is having trouble for religion, individual responsibility and Sure, that can happen, if somehow “The Glove” take us back and repeat the same catastrophic raising more, but we have outraised him by private enterprise as the cores of our society- outpoints the POTUS, the hard-fundraising mistakes that got us into the mess we found substantial margins, conserving our cash for -sharply contrasting with the Obama positions Barack Obama in the general election which ourselves in the first place.” the final three months. We have now raised on secularism, government domination and will be taking place in about 10 weeks. Shrewd move, link the Romney/Ryan ticket as much as Obama, but have way more a denigration of private enterprise. Congressman Ryan could be the President to the Bush era failed financial policies. Which cash on hand because we plan on peaking “At our Party Convention, we will attack of the United States sometime in the next may resonate with some folks. Whether the in November--not August. Obama on every front, and as Sarah Palin eight years. Or in the next 12, if “The Glove” accusations are true or not. “What has this spending bought Obama? urged us to do, ‘set our hair on fire.’ As the were to somehow knock off the incumbent So what do we have to look forward to, Among registered voters he is even with keynote speaker, Chris Christie will ignite Prez. serve out his statutory two terms and politically wise, in the run-up to the election? my man, but among likely voters, Mitt’s enthusiasm from the moderates as Ryan has then turn over the reins to the youthful Ryan. One of the top-tier candidates decrying the leading. Now black ministers are calling him ignited the conservatives. This event will Chances of that happening, according to some obscene gouging that is currently happening a traitor and are organizing against him for unite the GOP with a level of enthusiasm very unscientific odds gleaned from unsavory to us petrol whores as we continue to get destroying black families. Romney has cut the left cannot equal. sources: ‘bout two percent. bent over at the pump by Big Oil whenever into Obama’s standing with Jewish voters “We will use our now superior financial But Ryan is the choice. And, as mentioned they stage another well-planned-out refinery with unequivocal support of Israel. Catholics resources to build our momentum day-by- in a prior column, not sure that too many of fire? Probably not. Or a drop in the obscene are offended by Obama’s threat against their day and issue-by-issue to reach a crescendo us will have our vote influenced by the second fees that the states are charging our kids to right to practice their religion. Hispanics are in November. Our allied independent banana on the ticket. Predictably, Ryan’s speech matriculate to college. Ha! Heard something disappointed at the lack of a comprehensive Super PACS will carry the negative attack writers crafted some nice alliteration when the about the fact that some cities out there were immigration law. Young voters are struck segment of the campaign while the Romney youthful Congressman addressed the world actually considering limiting the gouging that by massive unemployment. All in all, the campaign will carry the positive policy after being anointed by the Romney camp. they do with their parking meter scams…That Democratic coalition is teetering and will side of the campaign, ignoring the Obama Ryan said that America is a “nation facing would be welcome. Don’t see too many rip-off likely grow weaker with each subsequent ‘spitball’ campaign for the presidency. As debt, doubt and despair.” And shockingly, parking meters in Mayberry. Think the last time economic report.” Newt Gingrich said, ‘Every day, Obama blamed the aforementioned three Ds on the I saw a meter, I was parked on the top level A key element in Mitt’s campaign is that diminishes himself and the office he holds.’ current campaigning his butt-off POTUS. in the lot outside of the now-defunct Cooke’s he will not pander to separate segments of To paraphrase Bill Clinton, soon the era of “Regrettably, President Obama has become market, watching, among other sites, the setting society by race, gender, age or religion, big government will truly be over.” part of the problem…and Mitt Romney is the of a beautiful sunset gazing north towards the emphasizing distinctly separate Americas. With that conclusion, the cat doffed his solution,” cheered the youngster Ryan. Who iconic Hollywood sign perched way above the Instead he views us as a single nation facing helmet and bowed to the stunned and adoring happens to be a couple of decades younger tumult of the 405 north freeway. And I dropped common problems that require uncommon neighborhood. • than the 65-year-old Romney. nary a quarter in the slot. • Photo: Sedat Pakay Too Hot for Spot! When the mercury rises, leave Spot at home. HelpingAnimals.com


Lawndale 8.23.12
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